We are notorious for ignoring and denying death; we keep death out of sight and out of mind, postponing any serious considerations until death comes knocking at our door. This inevitably leaves us unprepared and frightened as we face our own mortality. We seldom get around to asking ourselves; "Will my death be good? Will it be wise? Will it matter?"
Death is not only a universal fact of life, part of the round of nature; but it's also a necessary part of what it means to be human. Everything that we value about life and living—its novelties, challenges, opportunities for development—would be impossible without death as the defining boundary of our lives. So planning for the inevitable, especially when death is not imminent, is important work for us all.
I recently had a very interesting weekend. On Saturday, I attended a daylong event at a local cancer research center called “Moving Beyond Cancer to Wellness.” In addition to several thought-provoking workshops, it also included a small vendors area. Many cancer-related agencies had set up tables to display brochures for their programs for those […]
The views expressed in this column are those solely of the author One of the most predictable questions I get when I present on the topic of aid in dying is: how do I go about finding someone who will be willing to help me? I always answer the same way: the only way to […]
The views expressed in this column are those solely of the author There was a wonderful, albeit astonishing, front-page article recently in The New York Times entitled: ‘Aid in Dying’ Movement Takes Hold in Some States. Not too long ago, this sort of even-handed presentation in “the paper of record” would have been unthinkable. I’m […]
“Depend upon it, Sir, when a man knows he is to be hanged in a fortnight, it concentrates his mind wonderfully.” – Samuel Johnson I’m a sucker for all wacky traditions associated with ringing out an old year and ringing in a new. For example, I can get a veritable whiplash with all the looking […]
“I was just sitting here thinking about what would be on my mind if I were in your place, facing my imminent death. I suppose I would be thinking about immortality, not in any conventional sense of that word, but more in terms of my legacy. I guess I’m really self-conscious, or maybe it’s vanity, […]
Richard is psychotherapist/clinical sexologist in private practice since 1981. He lives and works in Seattle, WA.
He is the author of The Amateur’s Guide To Death and Dying; Enhancing the End of Life.
He has been working with terminally ill, chronically ill, elder and dying people in hospital, hospice, and home settings for over 30 years. He facilitates support groups for care-providers and clinical personnel, and provides grief counseling for survivors both individually and in group settings.
He founded Paradigm Programs Inc., an innovative nonprofit organization, as an outreach to and resource for terminally ill, seriously ill, elder and dying people.
He often speaks in the public forum on policy issues related to religion, human sexuality, aging, death and dying, living with chronic illness, and moral development.